Get all 26 Chris Conway releases available on Bandcamp and save 50%.
Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of Live Songs Now, Unlocked Songs, EPs & Singles Collection, Me Time (single), Fake News and other silly songs (EP), The Last Phoenix - Live 2009, So Many Years (single), We're All Astronauts, and 18 more.
1. |
Fake News
02:33
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Fake News - ©2018 Chris Conway
1. There are no animals in the zoo
I know you don’t believe me
But I tell you it’s true
There’s just a vegetable lasagna and a didgeridoo.
But there are no animals in the zoo.
chorus
Fake News! Fake News!
There's never been an innovation
That's so easy to do
You just make the true, false
Then you make the false, true
So if you fake with me
I’ll fake it with you.
2. There no naked people on the Internet
I’ve been searching all day I haven’t found any yet
I’ve seen a few things I’d rather forget
But there are no naked people on the Internet
chorus
bridge
You don’t have to do it on Twitter.
You can fake stuff any old way,
You don’t have to be twisted and bitter.
Coz some folks will believe whatever you say.
3. There are no stupid people in the government
They’re all altruistic angels and they're heaven sent
None are dishonest, none are totally bent,
And there are no stupid people in the government
chorus?
4. There are no aliens in outer space
You may think that it’s a pretty big place
But I searched it all, and the human race
Are the only aliens in outer space.
chorus
Fake News! Fake News!
There's never been an innovation
That's so easy to do
They used to be lies
Now theyre alternative truths
So if you fake with me
I’ll fake it with you.
This song never ends.
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2. |
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Make It Not So (Trek No-Nos) - ©2016 Chris Conway
Star Trek is a show, that I've always loved,
Well at least since I was 4 years old.
Now I think we've known eachother well enough
For a few home truths to be told.
So the TV goes on, the music rolls,
Where is it this time we're gonna boldly go?
Oh no!!! - It's another holodeck.
Episode – we know just what were gonna get...
“End Program!” doesn't work.
The safety protocols have been shut down.
A hologram character has gone beserk.
I seem to be stuck in nightclub town.
The pastiche comedy is overdone.
The writers are having too much fun!
No no no no, no no no no, No no make it not so!
No no no no, no no no no, No no make it not so!
After all these years, my ritual's still the same.
I get my dinner ready right on time.
Original, Next Gen, Voyager or Deep Space 9
Any kind of Trek really I don't mind. (Apart from the Abbrams reboot movies...)
I'm going to pretend they were just a bad dream,
I want to watch a show that doesnt make me scream...
Oh no!! Its another Klingon
Episode – we know just what we're gonna get...
Family honour, and “A good day to die”,
Haven't I already seen this show?
Staggering around smashed on blood wine,
How they built an empire I don't know!
Like braggard drunks on a Saturday night
Yawn, here comes another Bat'leth fight....
No no no no, no no no no, No no make it not so!
No no no no, no no no no, No no make it not so!
My favourite episodes,
Are when the plot never strays too far,
I can walk around the starship,
Or the space station Promenade,
Or meet you in Ten Forward,
Beside a window of starlight.
But something sadly tells me.
That's not gonna happen tonight.
Oh no! It's another Old Earth
Episode – It's another Q
Episode – It's a Captain-falls-in-love
Episode – It's a Data-saves-the-day!
Episode -
No no no no, no no no no, No no no no, no no no no No no make it not so!
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3. |
The Space Accountant
02:51
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The Space Accountant - ©2020 Chris Conway
1. I am an astronaut
Just like my dad
He said I had the the right stuff
I think he must be mad.
After ten years on the Mars run
I wanted to fly into the sun
But recalled the number crunching fun
I had when I was a lad.
chorus
I wish I was an accountant
Just like my Uncle Roy
I always wanted to be one
Since I was a boy.
So long you spacer deadbeats
You can keep your space fleets
My future lies in spreadsheets.
An accountant’s life for me.
2. I was sent to Space Academy
My father made me go.
Of starships and astronomy
I didn’t want to know
To wake me from the slumbers
Of eclipses and penumbras
I secretly added numbers
That made my heart beat so.
chorus
3. So I studied back on Earth
Accountant training it was tough
But after a couple of years of it
I’d really had enough.
Get me out of this counting place
I want to rejoin the human race
Take me back to outer space
I’ve got the right stuff!
chorus B
I wish I was an astronaut
Like Dad and Aunty Jean
I've always wanted to be one
Since I was a teen
The Mars run never got me down,
It’s backwards and forwards and round and round.
But it beats accountency hands down
An astronaut's life for me!
Two years later,
Earth, Mars, Earth, Mars, Earth, Mars, Earth, Mars, Earth, Mars, Earth, Mars, Earth, Mars, Earth, Mars,
4. With both space and accounting
I had some serious doubts
Then I thought if I combined the two
The bad would cancel out
Now I do accounts on Starbase 9,
Like no aunt, or uncle, or parent of mine,
Now I count the stars in my spare time.
And I've finally found out,
chorus C
That I'm glad I'm an space accountant
Just like I happen to be.
I always wanted to be one,
Since university,
Accountants and spacer deadbeats,
Counting all the space fleets
Outer space on spreadsheets.
A space accountant’s life for me.
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4. |
Unsung Parts Of You
03:04
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Unsung Parts Of You - © 2019 Chris Conway
1.
Have you noticed certain parts of the body,
Are always mentioned in song?
And the rest of the body gets ignored,
Coz it somehow just sounds wrong.
But I’m a little different
And you will soon find out
That I love the parts of you that no one ever sings about.
2.
I gaze longingly into your ear,
I worship your nose and toes,
And has anyone ever told you,
You’ve got adorable elbows?
What started this love crusade.
Was when I first saw your left shoulder blade,
Coz I love the parts of you that no one ever sings about.
bridge
The rest of the world can have...
Your eyes, your hair, your lips, your face, your smile, your hands,
Songwriters are easy to please.
But can you think of another songwriter,
Who gets weak at the sight of your knees?
Unsung.... Unsung, it's sad but true.
Unsung.... Unsung parts of you.
3.
Your liver makes me shiver,
Your spleen is like a dream.
You’ve got the most beautiful brain,
That I have ever seen.
(Why aren't there more songs about brains?)
So when I say I love you inside and out,
I’m not playing tricks.
Others can have a date with your heart,
But I’d rather take out your appendix.
Coz I love the parts of you that no one ever sings about. x3
Unsung.
Until now.
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Chris Conway Leicester
Think David Crosby on a journey taking in Ireland, a jazz club, and Outer Space.
"Songs of Love &
Peace & Outer Space" is his slogan and that sums it up well.
He has toured with ex-Monkees Peter Tork, played with members of Jethro Tull and Fairport Convention as well as Vikki Clayton, Martin Carthy, Sally Barker, Pete Morton, Cathy Lesurf, & Tommy Emmanuel and Talvin Singh.
... more
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